Wednesday, November 26, 2014

My Holiday Soap Box

7 years ago this month my Dad died.  Jamie, the kids (only 6 of them then), and I spent 5 days in a hotel, and had Thanksgiving dinner at Denny's.  I also spent several hours Thanksgiving Day visiting my Mom in the hospital.

17 months later my Mom died during Holy Week, and we spent Easter weekend at the same hotel and Easter Sunday at at the same Denny's.

3 years ago Dante had severe cellulitis in his right arm; he and I spent December 23-26 in the Hospital.

These experiences made me very grateful for eating options on a holiday, and aware of the need for community workers to work on holidays, as well as hotel staff and other things we don't think of as necessary.

Waiting tables at a Cracker Barrel, means I have to work Thanksgiving and Easter.  It really stinks to not be with family the entire day....some guests make that feeling worse, some make me thankful to be there.

When I wait on an elderly couple whose family is too far away, it is a blessing to be the one to wish them a Happy Thanksgiving.  Going out to a restaurant might be the only thing that makes their day special.

I have waited on people going to or from their own jobs that day, when preparing a meal is the last thing on their mind after the shift just finished.  And there are those traveling home from a full day with family who need a short break from all the driving and traffic.

It really burns my biscuits though to wait on large parties who simply do not feel like cooking and so they all meet up to camp out at a few tables in a restaurant.

Seriously, toss a turkey in the oven, tell everyone to bring a dish and camp out in your own living room.

And now people are shopping on Thanksgiving and making even more people required to work for our gratification??? What are we thinking???

I'd better get off my box now and finish cleaning the kitchen...we celebrated a day early since Nik and I have to work on the real Thanksgiving Day.  It was a blessing to sit at the table with 7 of my 9 kids, although we missed the two big boys.




By the way, we celebrated without our Zachary because he is in the Navy and has to work.  We will also celebrate Christmas without him (again) because he has chosen to serve our country.  Please be sure to thank those who make this choice, because it most certainly benefits you.



I am thankful for my family, and for my job.

God is good.

PS, Apparently turkey makes Dante tired...




Sunday, November 2, 2014

Will You Help?

'Tis the Season to be jolly.  Or it will be soon, once Thanksgiving has passed and Christmas season "officially" begins.

The Christmas catalogs are already arriving daily in our mailbox, and Leif is convinced that the first day it snows will mean that it is Christmas.  Right then and there with that first flake.



It is time to start considering how we will spend our money this Christmas Season.  What we will buy for our children, and for our families.

It also means that it is time for charities to raise funds, Salvation kettles will appear at the entrance to every Wal-Mart, huge boxes will appear for toy drives led by the Marines and various police departments.  Churches will have Christmas trees decorated with tags featuring the name and age of a child in need, and gifts for those children will be purchased, wrapped, and left under the tree.

Remembering those who have very little is so important.

Remembering those who have nothing is also imperative.  Quite frankly, it is commanded by God...look up James 1:27.   Deuteronomy 10:18...Job 31:16-18...Isaiah 1:17


This year I have offered to be a Christmas Angel Tree Warrior for Reece's Rainbow .  When I first emailed my interest, I was told all the kids have sponsors.  This morning I received and email that a warrior had to drop out, and would I sponsor Xander?

I was telling Jamie about my decision to raise funds for this precious orphan, and Leif hear me mention "Xander"

He said, "I have a friend named Xander!  He's my brother and  I love him!"

No, we are not even remotely able to consider adopting the Xander I am sponsoring, but I do call my oldest by Xander, short for Alexander.

Leif does have a brother Xander that he loves, and I am asking all of you to help me raise funds for this little boy to have a family, possibly even a brother of his own to say, "He's my brother and I love him!"


Please visit this website to read more about this little boy, and then visit this one, search for his photo and donate towards the cost of his adoption, so a family will be able to afford to choose him as their son.

A donation of $35 or more will get you an ornament that will help you remember to pray for Xander, and for the family that will be able adopt him because of your gift and prayers.

Right now he is in the $0-$99 raised section, but by Christmas I am hoping he will be at the top and the goal of $1000 will be realized.  

Will you help?


Monday, October 20, 2014

A Demonstration is Worth a Thousand Explanations

Often an explanation is enough to teach a person how to do something new.  I can read a recipe and follow it successfully, and illustrations with the directions are usually enough to put together a new purchase.

My triplets do not learn by explanation, they learn by example.  Auditory processing plays a role in this, due in large part to having Down Syndrome, and they really have a hard time visualizing what I am saying.

A demonstration is worth a thousand explanations, though.

When they saw me sit down to play with play dough, it was not long before they were also exploring what they could make. Having difficulty understanding a verbal or written explanation does not mean the cannot learn things.  In fact, given the proper instruction and opportunity for hands on learning and repetition, they learn quite quickly.
,
  Amelia told me she was making some train tracks.

ShanLin does not talk, but she was quite focused on her project.  Those little balls of dough certainly had her fine motor skills being improved.

 Micah was able to balance a triangle, and give me an adorable smile.

Kimberly was really working on her hand/eye coordination, helping Micah with his projects.

She even tried to take over Micah's projects.


Leif has taken the lead with their time outdoors, getting Amelia to climb trees with him, and Kimberly to climb up the play set.  She can be a bit playful herself, trapping Leif on the ladder.



While we do handwriting and reading, textbooks do not play much of a role in our home school days.

Instead of time spent explaining, we spend a lot of time doing, a lot of time learning....



And lots of time having fun.


God is good, always.

Monday, October 6, 2014

The World Keeps Turning.

We finished our first month of schooling...and we are looking forward to working our way through month 2.

Kimberly has turned 3 and therefore has stopped all of her therapies.

Dante is fully enrolled in a special needs classroom and loves it.

Sunny has turned 13.

Today is Amelia's 11th Adoption Anniversary.

Nikita bought a puppy that is just adorable and sure to keep her busy.

And the world keeps turning.

I am so thankful for our life, our home, our amazing children.  Alexander in college, Zachary in the Navy, Nikita contemplating her future, the triplets doing so well at home, Dante in school, Leif rocking our world daily, and Kimberly making sure our world revolves around her.

God is good.






Friday, September 5, 2014

First Week of School

The last two weeks Facebook has been overrun with photos of adorable children holding signs and going off to the first day of school.  

As a home school family we have no such photos to share, but we have had a busy first week of school.  Similar to how I remember public schools went, this first week has been a time of transitioning back into a routine and finding out where the kids are in their education and where they can go.


Here are a few photos of the first week of school at Lindsay Academy:



We did some table work our first week.  Micah needs to work on his hand writing, Sunny is still barely reading, and Amelia is doing well but needs some help with reading comprehension.


Leif seems to have decided this year he will focus on home ec/life skills, even though most schools do not do it until much later.  He wants to take up knitting and promised me a new washcloth.  It took me an hour to untangle the yarn.



And he is teaching Kimberly how to make mud pies.  This meant two kids in the tub in the middle of the day.  Personal hygiene counts as a Life Skill.




I did not purchase a curriculum for any of the kids this year.  We are using more of a Charlotte Mason approach.  I did splurge on this set from Spielgaben, which will really help with their thinking skills,  Kimberly loved it and was working on her eye/hand coordination, Amelia is working on looking at the photo and copying the blocks.  
Leif is also working on catching bugs...maybe to cook for a class?  He has a grasshopper in the jar.



Quiet time is going to be an absolutely essential part of our school day.
I am sure the kids will benefit from it too.
Leif even brought his grasshopper up for quiet time.  

Dante is home also, and when pushed he will do amazing things for me.  But I cannot do everything hand over hand with him AND home school the triplets, AND give Leif the time my little four year old needs AND help Kimber reach her full potential.  What helped me realize this was our short little walk to the Library on Thursday for story hour.  Who knew walking 50 yards with these kids could be made such a trial by Dante.

I called the school, and we have an IEP meeting scheduled for him next week.  Considering last year at this time we were 90 days without an IEP meeting, getting one 10 days away was pretty impressive...the new team chair could be good...it also helps that I found out his favorite aide has been moved back to his classroom. 

So I am looking forward to a good year at home with the kids, taking it one week at a time and always seeking God's will for us.

Sunday, August 17, 2014

Growing Up

 I think we have photographs of each of the kids washing the dishes for the first time.
 She thinks she is just having fun, splashing in the water and "washing" some spoons.
But I know what she is doing.
Kimberly is not just playing.
She is learning to help.

My little girl is growing up.
I am so thankful for this little girl.

Monday, August 4, 2014

All I Want...

Jamie and I are blessed.  We have a home, 3 vehicles, secure jobs, and food in the cupboards.

And 9 AMAZING kids.

Gustavo, I am happy.

We are allowed to choose to home school.  We have graduated 3, and once Nikita leaves for the Navy tomorrow (sniff) we will have launched all three on career paths.  The remaining 6 will be home again this year, and I look forward to our time together each day.

Jamie teaches, which means he makes a difference in a lot of teenagers lives each day, and gets to be home with us every night, weekend, holiday, summer, and snow days too!!

I have a good job waiting tables, with as many or as little hours as I need.  (Cutting back after Nikita leaves!)

Just one thing is out of my grasp.

All I want is to sit next to my husband in church on Sundays.

Instead, autism has separated us.  The problem:  there are not enough adults willing to take a turn being with my Dante so that he can attend Children's Church.  It became too inconsistent for my family, wondering if there was someone this week or do we stay home.  So I said thanks for the time spent, but this is falling apart.  I even tried sitting in the glassed front Family Room where we can see and hear but not be heard...at least I could see Jamie and the other kids sitting out there in the congregation...but the other parents find it too difficult to not use the room as fellowship time instead of a place to let your kids be fidgety.  When a parent turned off the volume of the service so it would not interrupt his conversation, I was done.

Done trying to get my son into a church that does not understand Special Needs.

I really think it is not that complicated, but then I do spend every day with 5 kids who have down syndrome with one of them also significantly impacted by Autism.  

Huge churches with amazing Special Needs Ministries are out there. There is an entire ministry devoted to helping church create their own Special Needs Ministry.  The Inclusive Church has an amazing website with resources.  There are churches that host special events or have respite night for families.

While special buddies or some respite and a night out would be great, all I want is to sit next to my husband during the service.  

*Not enough volunteers?  Lower the cut off age for children attending, then the volunteers are not spread so thin.  Typical 4th, 5th, and 6th grades can learn to sit through the service.

*Kids with Autism, ADD, ADHD cannot sit through the Bible story?  Stop having one.  They just sat through the songs and Scripture reading...isn't the point of Children's Church to accommodate every kid's inability to sit through and comprehend an entire sermon?  Adjust the room so that the entire setting is a Bible learning time, without having to sit and listen to a story then sit and color a picture, then go in the gym and throw balls at each other to burn off energy. This link has some great ideas, again from the Inclusive Church  http://theinclusivechurch.wordpress.com/2014/05/01/orange-conference-breakout-notes-strategies-to-include-every-child/ .  Kids with special needs are not the only ones that benefit from a hands on or sensory learning environment, especially when most of them have just sat through Sunday School.

We are not going to start church hopping until we find one that loves our kids, because the church we attend does love our kids.  It is just that Dante is hard to understand.  It is so easy to smile and greet us every Sunday morning, but when I am not holding Dante's hand and keeping him next to me, it is just harder for the smiling and nodding people to know what to do.

So Dante and I will stay home on Sunday mornings, because I know that God is good, even when I cannot sit next to my husband in church.